Don't Read if You Love Renee Zellweger

This isn't a Renee-bashing episode but I really don't see the draw. I only saw the previews for Leatherheads and it was enough to keep me away. This morning I saw her on Good Morning America promoting her most recent film, New In Town. I won't be seeing that one, either. I can't stand to watch her, she does that funny thing with her mouth like she's trying to pout, getting it all round-like and she has beady eyes. She's stiff, almost like a mannequin, afraid if she moves something might become dislodged, or worse. I'm not sure but I'm thinking most of her movies don't do particularly well at the box office and are quite forgettable. Yet, she keeps making movies that get good, solid runs at theaters around the country. Any movie with Renee in it doesn't seem to have much trouble selling itself and I can't figure out why that is.

What really gets to me is that a beautiful movie like Slumdog Millionaire almost didn't make it to the theaters. It was a movie that seemed doomed to head straight to DVD because it has a "starless" cast (Renee should have practiced her Indian accent a la Bridget Jones's Brit accent, died her hair black and took on the part of Latika and the studios would be tripping all over themselves to have the film). Warner's top brass didn't see enough financial upside to invest more than the $5 million they'd spent on the U.S. rights but they had no problem bringing us the gem called Lady In The Water - no, I didn't see that! Danny Boyle is responsible for the wonderful film called Millions which received favorable reviews all over the place but for some unknown reason the executives at Warner didn't want to give Slumdog a chance. Yet, Renee keeps chugging out hapless movies. Thank you Fox Searchlight for seeing the light and getting this movie into theaters.

Okay, granted, Renee was in some movies that were well-acclaimed, such as Chicago, Cold Mountain, Cinderella Man and I saw two of those but I still didn't enjoy Renee in them. Jerry McGuire was a fun movie but I really couldn't see Tom Cruise falling for Renee Zellweger so that part was not believeable to me. I'm sure we won't see her in anything quite as magical and wonderful as Slumdog Millionaire and I'm glad of that because if she's in it I won't see it. What do people see in her, that's what I wanna know.

Patrick "Swoon" Swayze

I watched the interview he did with Barbara Walters. It is terribly tragic and sad what the actor is having to endure. I never thought much about him, he was never one of my favorite actors although I really did love Dirty Dancing. Ghost was only so-so for me but Demi Moore was adorable in it. I did swoon over Richard Gere in An Officer and A Gentleman and I'm one of the very few people who liked him in the re-make of Breathless. But, my really favorite actor at the time was William Hurt, like Kathleen Turner said in the movie Body Heat to Hurt's character, "You're not too smart, I like that in a man." What's not to love about a fella like that?

Back to Patrick. I always recognized his ability to dance his heart out, there's no denying that talent in the man. He would've been fantastic as a regular on Dancing With The Stars but I think you are either a dancer or a star wanting to be a dancer but you can't be a star who is a dancer dancing with a star who wants to be one. Phew, I think you know what I mean. Patrick's wife is an accomplished dancer, too. She's a beautiful lady. I had never seen her in an interview before and I was impressed, very impressed. She's beautiful, intelligent, caring and supportive. They've been married for 33 years and admit to having some pretty ugly battles but they stuck through it all.

Modern medicine most definitely has a place in the world. I don't support anyone being over-medicated but I believe medicines can make life better when administered and used properly. Acting, to me, never really seemed like a big deal. I never considered actors heroes or heroines or mentors. Acting is more like playing make-believe and isn't what I consider serious business. Having said that, I love celebrities, I'm fascinated with their lives and really enjoy photos of them. Call me "shallow gal", I deserve it. I'm so shallow that the book on my nightstand is Here's The Story by Maureen McCormick. (I borrowed it from the library and so far I haven't found any food or scribbling in it). Anyway, back to Patrick. He suffered through horrendous chemotherapy and worked 12 hours a day on his new series, The Beast, for A&E. The schedule, he said, was really tough and made even tougher with the treatments and the cancer. He refused to take any pain killers because, he said, it would take the edge off and his performance could possibly suffer. Yikes! It's just acting, right? I can't imagine I would put acting before my own comfort. I have a pretty high tolerance for pain but I am pretty sure it's not that high. I don't know why he would want to suffer so much pain just for a TV show. It's not really admirable. It's puzzling beyond puzzling to me that acting would mean so much to an individual. I wonder if it's more about the money. His treatments must be very costly and Swayze hasn't really done anything notable for a while. If it is about the money I think it's very uncool beans he had to have more suffering piled onto what he's already trying to manage. Health care in this country is so expensive people are forced to great lengths to stay alive and be able to afford it.

I'm wondering something else, too. Jett Travolta - I hope, I really hope, that he wasn't taken off the medication to control his seizures because of anything to do with Scientology. I don't know much about Scientology but I do remember Tom Cruise blasting poor Brooke Shields (who, BTW, probably gave him his start in the business in Endless Love) for taking meds to battle post-partem depression. Like I said, sometimes medications are needed.

Anyway, it's very uncool beans if people can't afford health care and medications while Laura Bush buys a set of dinner plates for the White House to the tune of $475K. I sure hope Malia and Sasha don't have to do the dishes like my sister and I did!

I Love My Library

That's right, I love my local library. It amazes me the range and volume of books and DVDs available. From my computer I can log into the system and renew books, request books and browse the catalog.

I remember back in the olden days we had to learn the Dewey Decimal System to be able to look up the books on cards. There were furniture-like cabinets made narrow enough and deep enough to just fit the little cards in. The drawers were really long, or so it seemed when I was only 3'2" tall. I loved our library as a kid. Everything was natural wood, the floors, the shelves, the tables. It smelled of wood and books, a rather pleasant smell. It also seemed really big, but since I was really small I am thinking my perception today would be quite different. I used to get a lot of books from the library. One thing I remember quite well is that we all cared for the items we borrowed. We were taught to respect books and so we did. We didn't bend down the corners to mark our place or drop food on the pages and, heaven forbid, write in any of the books. Everyone I knew returned the books on time to avoid the minimal late fee. Entering the library was entering into a world of hushed whispers, even silence. If anyone were to speak audibly a bespectacled
and prim woman would shush them. It was almost like entering the Catholic church that sat right next door (I know this because all my friends were Catholic and I used to go with them while they confessed their sins - sometimes it was a long wait).

Today the library is very different. For one, the floors are covered with foul smelling carpeting and the aroma of wood and books is long gone. This library is relatively new, too. The shelves and tables are metal and finding a real person to talk to isn't all that easy. One checks out electronically. But the selection is impressive, and not just because I was able to find Jonathan's Story by Julia London. I've found many great books and if I can't find them on the shelf I can request them and in a day or two they will arrive from any of the many locations in the county. In fact, there's usually more than one copy to be had so it's not difficult to get the book I want.

The selection of DVDs and videos is outstanding. I could kick myself for paying rental fees to watch a movie at home at my leisure. I've watched movies I never would've rented in the first place simply because I can get them for nothing, my favorite price. Recently, I watched The King of California, a movie I would never have considered paying to watch. It was a pretty good movie, too. I love Costco as much as the next guy but I would not want to die under one (you have to see the movie to know what I'm referring to). I also borrowed The Cranes Are Flying, Criterion Edition, no less!

You are wondering what could be uncool beans about it, right? Unfortunately, people have lost their respect for what doesn't belong to them. The books have caked on food between the pages. If that weren't enough, it appears as though some people take these borrowed books to the pool or the beach because they've been soaked and dried making the pages all wavy. Not only are the corners bent down but some whole pages have been folded in half. The worst transgression of all is people writing in the books. It appalls me that people would do such a thing. I've borrowed more than a few books where it appears someone fancies himself a better writer than the writer. It's like they are playing school and acting like an English teacher grading the manuscript. I can't help chuckling at the stupidity of these people because more often than not their corrections are incorrect. Don't they know that writers have editors and publishers who go over the stuff before printing? Ok, sure, once in a while there is a typo. I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about people taking pens and marking through sentences and re-writing them, crossing out words and changing the grammar, or suggesting a "better" way of writing something. I find it distracting and immensely disrespectful. They have no right to damage property that doesn't belong to them in such a manner. It's entirely selfish and egoistical. If the people doing this think it makes them look smart it doesn't. It's very uncool beans.

I'm also appalled at the condition of the DVDs. Most of them I pass over and that's the reason I end up with movies I wouldn't ordinarily rent. I borrow them merely because they aren't damaged and will most likely play without a hiccup in my player. I wanted to borrow Castle In The Sky, a pricey DVD if one were to buy it, but when I opened the case to see how it faired I couldn't believe the damage. It makes me wonder about people. After all, the ones ruining the discs, carelessly throwing them around unprotected, are also the ones who benefit from getting them at no cost. The huge number of incredibly wonderful films available on DVD at my library that are completely trashed is unfathamable and sad. It doesn't reflect well on us as a society. It really doesn't take any effort to handle them gently and respectfully. Such thoughtlessness is tragic and it's totally uncool beans.

That Touch of Yuck

Do you get a feeling of comfort when you see food handlers wearing gloves, protected from the germs that can get into foodstuffs from dirty fingers? Well, don't.

Several months back I was at a well-known grocery chain in front of the seafood & meat department. A young Ukrainian fellow was working the counter and, I was happy to see, wearing protective (?) gloves. An elderly gentleman was being served. Firstly, he wanted a pound or so of raw chicken nuggets, all slimy and rubbery looking, jiggling in the gloved hand as the Ukrainian dug into the gooey mess to grab fistfuls of the raw flesh to load into the baggie.

"Will there by anything else?" he asked the customer. Yep, the elderly gentleman certainly did want something else. "I'll take a pound of that peeled, tail-on, cooked shrimp over there."

Our Ukrainian is wearing those gloves, the same gloves he wore when digging into the raw salmonella-hazard mess of jiggling chicken pieces. He proceeded to dig into the cooked shrimp and pile them into a baggie for his customer. The customer was talking with fellow patrons about the delicious shrimp cocktail he was about to have that day and how easy it was to just pour some ready-made sauce into the bowl and place the already prepared shrimp on the platter and ENJOY! He was oblivious to what was happening with the handling of his shrimp and the potential trip to the emergency room he was about to encounter. I wonder if he survived. But, at least the server was wearing gloves!

More recently I went to a fancy chocolatier's that was relatively new in the area. I'd read about how yummy the confections were and, in particular, the kulfi was a must taste. My mother's birthday is around the corner and she simply adores chocolates. I used to buy her the most wonderful chocolates in Atlanta at a place called Maison Robert's. He was from France and his candies were divine, made on the premises and he demanded that his chocolates never, ever be refrigerated because it would damange the delicate goods. I asked my daughter if she would like me to treat her to a kulfi so we could check out the goods in the shop. The young girl at the counter was wearing gloves as she packed the cute, little boxes full of delightful morsels of hand-made, on the premises, chocolates. She offered samples of anything we were interested in. We declined samples but ordered a couple of kulfis. It took a while for her to dig them out of the back of a freezer in the back of the store. She proceeded to unwrap them for us (I don't know why, really) and she offered a half-apology for the appearance of one of the treats. Seems they melted on the truck from California and refroze. One of them had refrozen with the stick smack dab in the middle so one couldn't hold it to eat it. I suggested perhaps they should be discounted since they were in pretty bad shape and her reply was, "I can't do that because they are still edible." Huh? You mean, if they weren't edible they would be eligible for discounting? Would anyone want to buy them at any price if they weren't edible? I was glad to see she was still wearing her gloves. To help us out she pulled the bottom half of the treat off and tossed it in the trash can to reveal a piece of the stick to hold on to. I tried to stop her from throwing half of the treat away (these things cost $3.50/each and they are small to start with) to no avail. She was intent on being helpful. She handed us the treats with extra gloves for us to don and a pile of napkins. I might add here that none of the above helped, we were still covered down to the elbow with the sugary, sticky, melted mess. After freeing her hands from the kulfis she scratched her nose and took our money and put it in the cash drawer. As we left the store she went back to packing chocolates in the boxes. She was wearing the same gloves. I don't know but maybe money is safer than raw chicken.

I've since determined those gloves aren't for OUR protection. They wear those gloves to keep their hands from getting all yuck. That, to me, is really uncool beans.

The Trouble With Holidays

All the stores are closed, well, just about all of them. Kmart is usually open but our Kmart is having a going-out-of-business sale and all sales are final. I stay away from that kind of event. I don't really like to shop but I have to say, the feeling I get going out when all the stores are closed is down right eerie. The parking lots are empty and ominous looking. It feels like The Day The Earth Stood Still, so little movement. I hate lots of traffic, too, but this quietude is upsetting just the same. At least some of the bars are open. The problem with New Years Day is that no one is at the bar because they drank themselves under the table the night before and into the early hours of the New Year Day so most people are home in bed nursing their dastardly hang-overs. The ones who didn't get totally smashed are planning their big football parties. You know the kind, lots of chips and salsa, chicken wings, deli meats, and maybe a pot of piping hot chili if the host is really ambitious. Of course, for those whose wives and girl friends have opted for a movie there's pizza-by-phone, delivered right to the door.

Back to the stores being closed, I'm thinking about the people who work at those stores who have the day off. Wouldn't they like to do a little shopping on their day off? They don't get the chance to shop when they are working. If you work at Victoria's Secret but are in dire need of a new toaster oven you need to get out of the store you work in and go shopping. It's not fair, really. I really don't care for this eerie feeling of desolation the holidays bring.

Well, since the stores are closed and I don't feel like going to the crowded movie theater or to my local watering hole I may as well get something done. I'm finally going to wash all the tile in my house, and I have a lot of that. I hate washing the floor, it's definitely not my idea of cool beans.

Happy New Year, everyone.

Let's Do Lunch

We don't eat out much around here, too expensive and too often the food doesn't meet expectations. Alas, today I threw caution to the wind and took the family out to lunch. It's a pet peeve of mine when restaurants aren't clean, but I know that doesn't bother most diners. We liked our food, Japanese sushi rolls, miso soup, all good, actually. But, my goodness, the table and floor were not clean at all and the seats were covered with last night's rice - at least I'm hoping the establishment was open last night or else that rice was from who knows when. The floor was sticky, too. The rice in my sushi rolls could've been stickier so they would have held together while I ineptly tried dipping them in soy sauce with the chopsticks. The table had what I assume was soy sauce dripping down the front and the glass table top was unnaturally frosted. Will I eat out again? Yep. Will I return to this very same restaurant again? Hey, I'm going back next Friday. Did I forget to mention the food was good?